Brother killed his own wife, father's battle to get custody of children

2025-09-24 22:02:00, Denoncim CNA

"It's been almost a year and a half since I last saw him. I miss him so much."

The case of Erjon Sinani, a resident of Tirana, has brought back into the spotlight a sensitive issue, child custody after a family tragedy.

In April 2023, Erjoni lost two of his dearest people in one night, his wife and brother, leaving him alone with two young children, then only 2 and 4 years old. After the loss of his wife, Erjoni, in the midst of pain and uncertainty, decided to temporarily take the children to his wife's parents, to get through the first difficult moments.

But when he tried to take the children back to raise them himself, he faced opposition from the children's grandparents and uncle. The case went to court, and the court ruled that the children should be given to the grandparents and uncle in custody.

'Stop' met the child protection worker, who said the children should stay with their father.

"I have always been surprised how the parties ended up at the courthouse doors, because in my opinion, without any hesitation the children should have gone to their father," said social worker Joana Filo.

'Stop' also stopped near the social worker of the Lundë administrative unit, where the children's grandparents live.

"The children live with their grandparents, they are enrolled in a private school. I don't know who enrolled them. At the moment they are safer with their grandparents. I don't know the father's conditions. I think I have done my job. At the moment he is safe with his grandparents," says the social worker.

The decision was based, among other things, on a psychological report drafted by psychologist Ines Haxhimali, who argued that the children are more stable in their current environment and that if the father wants to take them, he should change residence, to avoid the trauma associated with the place of the tragedy.

According to psychologist Gejsi Anamali, in this case, the issue of housing is being played with for a trauma that the children have not had the opportunity to memorize, due to their young age.

"An 18-month-old child really feels the absence of a parent because he definitely feels it, but he has not experienced any of the scenes. So has the 3-year-old child. Let's go back to the case before, that the boy was not present the night the mother lost her life and the girl was small. Then I call them excluded from facing the trauma in the first case.

Of course, the absence of one parent will continue to be a trauma even when they are adults, they will feel the absence and will face the situation. But, removing the father's custody and leaving the custody of two grandparents who are, first of all, of age, which our law does not allow, and an uncle who does not have the structure, the family. So he does not have a wife and children.

"What is the basis, this father is a user, he is irresponsible, he has a criminal record, he has deviant behavior, he has mental health disorders?! I did not see any of these things cited in the report. Then by what right, dear colleague, legislator and law enforcement officer, do we take away the right of these children to stay with their father. They cannot make such a request to move from that apartment and stay in another one," said psychologist Ines Haxhimali./tvklan.al